PROOF EVERYTHING ONLINE IS TRUE

On April 1, 2015, in Funny, Horror / Weird, Wake the Wicked, by Christian Baloga

How Do You Know If What You Read Online Is Legit? 

Come on! There’s no denying that everything you read, see, watch and hear on the Internet is true. You hear me? It’s all facts. Nasty rumors and deceit can’t be spit out across the Internet like the wild spread of “Black Death” in Europe. They just can’t put anything on the internet that isn’t true. Where did I hear that? The Internet.

But what about those whiny, impulsive, vitriolic tirades I see on the net, people publicly shaming one another? They aren’t, as one might think, just desperate attempts by lonely harpies to deceive others, to compensate for the love they didn’t receive from their parents—a wound that drives them to attempt to fill emptiness with the satisfaction of revenge. Certainly not.

In general, opinions are considered to be subjective. However, there is a special rule. Once written online, opinions become facts. Apart from the Internet providing this information, how in satan’s great garden of fire do we know this is true?

I have more proof!

That’s right. Take a look at the gallery below. I’ve assembled this rare collection of celebrities, historical and religious figures, animals, and more, all reading Wake the Wicked: Thirteen Twisted Tales, before it was even published. Take a look and read on.

But how is this proof? Couldn’t this be one of those fancy-schmancy hoaxes?

Well, most of the Greats above were dead long before “Wake the Wicked: Thirteen Twisted Tales” was written, edited, and published. True. So, I commissioned the most notorious time-traveling paparazzi I could find to journey back in time, track down each Great, and present them my book. Once they had it in their possession it was a waiting game with only two outcomes: they’d either start reading the book or chuck it to the curb.

Sometimes, as these brave paparazzi warriors later told me, they had to prowl for days in trees and bushes, inside bedroom closets and under musky basement stairs; they drank stale rain water and ate nothing but rat droppings, sock lint and acorns till they got “The Shot!”

And, as one can imagine, the book wasn’t everybody’s cup of poison-laced tea. I mean, did you see some of the photos above? Mommie Dearest, for example, was not impressed. I should have known. She’s way too sophisticated for such juvenile entertainment. I can’t wait to read the review though. I have a feeling it’ll be suffocated by ten-cent words and trite adverbs.  I better get the popcorn ready now before the fireworks start. My bad. On the other hand, Mickey Mouse and Morticia Addams appeared to “get it” right away.

See, there’s no denying that everything you read is wisdom from the gods. If the internet says it’s true, if trolls say it’s true, and the photos above show it’s true—it’s true. Gone aren’t the days of common sense and well researched knowledge. The Internet is one giant source of factual information.

April Fools!

Hope you had as many laughs checking out these hoaxes as I did making them.

Never forget: online gossip blazes like wildfire and Tu Stultus Es if you believe it’s all accurate.

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Addy Award Winners

Click image to view story.

I received a text from my dad saying, “There is an article in today’s paper about the addy awards that u won.” It was regarding a recent newspaper article in the Citizens Voice titled “AAF holds annual awards ceremony.” Since it’s the season and I don’t have more info. on the awards I’ve won, I thought it’d be a good time to talk about what the AAF and Addy Awards are, and which I’ve won.

According to its website, the AAF, or, The American Advertising Federation, is America’s oldest advertising trade association, headquartered in Washington, D.C. This association acts as a “Unifying Voice for Advertising” and operates a multitude of programs and initiatives, including the annual American Advertising Awards, which was held on Friday in Northeast Pa., at Colarusso’s LaPalazzo in Moosic.

The AAF awards is the largest creative awards competition in the advertising industry and honors excellence in advertising. What graphic designer wouldn’t want to be a part of this?!

So, how many Addy Awards have I won? Uno. Dos. Tres! Three. Check out the gallery below to see them. And which have I won? As a student in 2009, I was awarded two bronze Addy Award medals for a book cover and candy package design.

Because money was nonexistent during my last semester of college in 2010, my former graphic design professor, Christine Medley, out of the kindness of her heart, submitted a T-shirt I designed for the CMYKlub, a graphic design club that I founded and was elected president to during my studies at Marywood University. I’m so grateful for Medley’s generosity. I hope she was proud that night at the ceremony after watching me win the gold Addy Award medal for the shirt. Thank you again!

To view more of my award-winners, check out a gallery of my portfolio here.

Addy Award Medal photos coming soon. Check back.

My Strange Passion With Fashion

On January 16, 2015, in Art, Fashion, Horror / Weird, by Christian Baloga

“Tailor these clothes to fit your guilt, what’s your size?”  ‘Donatella,’ Lady Gaga.

I design and alter most of my evening-wear to satisfy my specific style. Here are a few of my latest fashion undertakings that I’ve pieced together, just for shiggles, from the last few years.

Faux Leather Studded Jacket & Tee

Spiked Shoulder Tee & Faux Leather Studded Jacket

 

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“Black Magic Hat”
found antler, cloth, ink, antique frame, metal, fabric
Christian Baloga
2013

I designed the top hat to be worn during the Occultus event on July 12, 2013. Sad to say, I got stage fright and removed it last second.

I bought the antique frame attached to the front of the hat at an estate sale last year. Although I’m opposed to sacrificing animals for fashion, salvaging discarded animal material, such as the antler I found while helping a friend move gives this unwanted piece new life.

I also created a few prematurely aged cloth sigils that can be interchanged in the frame. The sigil displayed in this frame, according to The Book of Black Magic by A. E. Waite, “Endows the possessor with every virtue and talent, as well as with the desire to do good. All substances of evil quality can be rendered excellent by means of it.”

Some of the other pieces found in the gallery above are titled as follows: “Vampire Skull Tee,” “Spiked Shoulder Tee,” “Lion Knocker Necklace,” “Monocle Pentagram Necklace.”

Want more on fashion? Learn how to make your baggy jeans skinny by checking out my blog here.

Special thanks to Brian Kenny for modeling in a frigid Pennsylvania cemetery.

‘Good Vibrations,’ Watercolor Illustration

On November 18, 2014, in Art, Fashion, Illustration, by Christian Baloga

“Good Vibrations”
watercolor
Christian Baloga
2014

 

Good Vibrations

Good Vibrations

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Want a dose of weird? Pick up the Weekender newspaper and flip to page thirty to read a comprehensive, full-page interview on my human hair art on display now at Ripley’s Believe It or Not! museum in NYC. Click the picture below, or here, to read the complete interview online.

Weekender Newspaper Hair Art Article

Photo of the Weekender article on Christian Baloga’s hair art displayed at Ripley’s museum in NYC.

Holding the vampire bat that he made from human hair at Ripley’s Believe It or Not!

Would you believe me if I told you my artwork is on display at Ripley’s Believe It or Not! museum on Times Square, NYC? How about if I told you it was made from human hair? My own hair? Continue reading »

After Ripley’s Believe It or Not! saw the photo of my human hair sculpture of a vampire bat, I received an email, with little delay, asking if I was coming to their Bizarre Buying Bazaar! event where they ‘Odd’praise “odd, unbelievable, and bizarre” pieces. Taking this as a sign of interest, I reacted to the opportunity with vigor by booking a trip to NYC just a few minutes before the W-B to NYC bus departed—and by a few minutes I mean we, my friend and I, sprinted from my car, to the terminal, to the bus.

Once at The Port Authority of NY, it only took three minutes to walk to Ripley’s museum on Times Square. I had bats in my stomach, but I remained grounded, suppressing any expectations, as I sat down across a table from Edward Meyer, VP Exhibits & Archives at Ripley’s Believe It or Not!, and showed him three of my human hair sculptures: a vampire bat, a horse fly, and a black widow spider—all life-size. None of which, apart from the bat, have been displayed to the public.

When Mr. Meyer raised a congratulating hand over the table, I felt my heart stop. He bought all three pieces! All three!

Having worked so hard on these human hair sculptures, it’s an incredible, surreal feeling to know I am a contributing artist of the most iconic museum in world!

You may be thinking, weren’t those creepy hair pieces a part of your show titled Christian Baloga: The Beauty of Grotesque? Are you still having the exhibit later this year?

Well yes, they were a part of the show, an integral part, in fact. But having this opportunity to display my artwork to the world in a Ripley’s museum was an opportunity I could never turn down. As such, I’m postponing the local NEPA exhibit until further notice. Check back regularly and join the newsletter for updates.

Since childhood, Ripley’s Believe It or Not! has been my favorite museum, and now my work is part of it! Believe It or Not!

PS I also got to meet Evan Michelson from the Discovery Channel show Oddities [photo below]; when I showed her a photo of my human hair sculpture of the spider, she said “It’s beautiful.” I died.

Thanks to Angela Johnson, Edward Meyer, and the Ripley Archives. For further reading, visit the Ripley’s Facebook Page, website, and of course, the Times Square museum! All three human hair pieces will be displayed at the Times Square location until further notice. After which they will be shipped to other Ripley’s Museums. Also, I’m not sure when it’ll be aired, but if you see me on the NYC news, please record and share it with me!

“Fortune-Teller Hands”
archival ink, acrylic, plastic, metal, nail polish
Christian Baloga
2014

Upcycled Mannequin Parts: Fortune-Teller Hands

Happy World Goth Day! I’m delighted you took a break from your annual cemetery picnic to

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check out my artwork. I don’t know what the weather is like in your area, but in Northeastern Pennsylvania we woke up to thunder and lightning—how befitting!

These upcycled mannequin hands will be part of a future art exhibit titled “Christian Baloga: The Beauty of Grotesque.”

Expect more, but not all, posts from this upcoming art exhibition every couple weeks or so.

 

You don’t want to miss a thing! For the latest, follow Christian on Facebook, Twitter, Google+, Pinterest, Myspace, Tumblr, LinkedIn, and sign up for the newsletter on the left.

 

Podcast Interview – The Weird Show

On May 11, 2014, in Art, Books, Horror / Weird, by Christian Baloga

Listen to this! I was thrilled to have been interviewed on The Weird Show, podcast this week about my artwork, including the human hair sculptures that will be featured in my upcoming art exhibit “The Beauty of Grotesque,” writing, and a bit on my future creative endeavors. To be taken to this week’s episode of The Weird Show where you can listen to this episode titled “Conversational Dial Tone,” click here.

“Human Hair Vampire Bat”
human hair
Christian Baloga
2014

 

 [6.6.14 UPDATE]: 

Since I was fortunate enough to have this piece, and two other human hair sculptures, bought from Ripley’s Believe It or Not! museum, I have postponed the local NEPA art exhibit until further notice. Check back regularly and join the newsletter for updates.

Throughout history, human hair and its diverse styles have served as important cultural signifiers, symbolizing wealth, status, and health. The moment it’s detached from the human body, however, it becomes grotesque, often manifesting decay, loss, and repugnance.

This conditional perception of beauty is what inspired this sculpture, and a host other pieces in my future art exhibit currently titled “Christian Baloga: The Beauty of Grotesque,” that will be held sometime later this year.

Stitching this hairy life-size sculpture of a Common Vampire Bat took roughly seventy five hours. Just think about how much blood can be indulged upon in that time!

Expect more, but not all, posts from this exhibition every couple weeks or so.

Human Hair Vampire Bat Main

Human Hair Vampire Bat

 

Wake the Wicked Eyes Opening CoverOne year ago yesterday, on December 21, 2012, “Wake the Wicked: Thirteen Twisted Tales” was first published in eBook format!

There’s no better time than this to extend my sincerest thanks to those who have supported and brought this incredible endeavor to life.

To those who attended the book signing, wrote insightful reviews to help potential readers, suggested the book to others, or read the book out of morbid curiosity, I thank you! I could’ve never imagined how successful this bizarre collection of short stories would become.

I’ve learned more than I could’ve imagined on this yearlong roller coaster ride and it’s made me as passionate about story telling as ever!

Thank you again for creeping along with me, dear reader. I look forward to many more years of success. Stay tuned.